The Last Fight
by Rejhan
Summary: Her saddest memory from a century earlier is brought back by the words of a song, and for a moment, Tessa relives the night that she lost her husband. Song fic. COMPLETE.


Author's Note – This is my first _Infernal Devices_ piece, and it came to me whilst I was reading _Clockwork Prince_. I was listening to _Bullet For My Valentine_ at the time as well, and when I heard this song, all I could think of was Will and Jem. So, naturally, I had to write a story about it. I hope you all enjoy it!

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><p><strong>The Last Fight<strong>

Tessa Gray was sprawled out on Magnus Bane's couch, a Cosmo magazine open on the cushion before her, her slender, jean-clad legs kicking in the air as she aimlessly flicked through the glossy pages. In the background, a CD player was working its way through one of the warlock's CDs – she wasn't too sure what it was, but to her ears, it sounded like a lot of yelling – but she hadn't really been paying that much attention to it. It was only on for background noise.

Magnus had asked Tessa to house sit for him – mainly to keep the little kitty fluff ball that was Chairman Meow company, Tessa was sure – whilst he and Alec were away on some romantic holiday. Tessa had no idea where, as she didn't like to pry into Magnus's affairs if she could avoid it, and she usually did avoid Alec whenever possible. It wasn't that she didn't like Alec, but more the fact that he looked so much like Will Herondale that it often made her heart ache. She wished that Will and Alec could have somehow met each other, but she knew that they would have either hit it off as friends, or they would have tried to kill each other. The fact that Alec was a Lightwood wouldn't have helped his case with Will, either. Still, it was a situation that had often made Tessa smile, and thinking of it now, she realized that the CD player was playing an acoustic track with haunting tones and words that stabbed into her like a voice from the past. Scrambling into a seated position, she grabbed the remote control and flicked back to the start of the song, and then sat riveted as memories of her past flooded her mind – memories of the last night in the life of Jem Carstairs.

_I don't wanna stand beside you_

_I'm don't wanna try and feel the pain you're going through_

_Till the death you'll see this through._

The door to Jem's room slammed against the wall as Will stormed out, and Tessa was torn between going after him and staying by the side of her sick husband. Jem's illness had steadily deteriorated, and now the young man was bedridden, and worse, he had been told that he would not recover his strength this time. He had reached the end of his tragically short life, and not surprisingly, it was Will that couldn't cope with the news.

"Please Tessa, go and bring him back," the weak voice of Jem said, and Tessa turned to him, clasping his hand in hers. "He is my Parabatai; I don't want to do this without him here," he added, his silver eyes pleading with her. How could she say no to a dying man's wish?

"Okay. I'll find him," she promised Jem, giving him the best smile that she could manage before she lifted her skirts and raced out after Will.

The London night was cold, and a wind was blowing through the streets in gusty flurries that caused Tessa's dress to tangle around her legs as she practically ran through the cobbled streets. She knew Will, and she knew in which direction he always fled in, and soon enough she spotted him leaning against a wall in an alley, his black hair hiding his piercing blue eyes from view – eyes that Tessa had once lost herself in.

"Will?" she called out, and the young man started when he heard her, pushing away from the wall, and turning towards her. His face was a mask as always, hardly betraying what was happening underneath, but Tessa had learnt to look for other things – the slight hunching of his shoulders, the way his eyes refused to look at her for very long – and knew that he was hurting.

"You shouldn't have come after me, Tess," he said. He was the only one who ever called her that, and it still sent a tingle of delight through her.

"What choice did I have? I'm not here for myself; Jem asked me to bring you back," she said, and a look of pure pain shot across his handsome face before he managed to hide it once again.

"I can't go back. I just- I can't," he said, shaking his head.

_Cold sweats, hallucinations _

_I wanna scream to show_

_The hell I'm going through _

_The addiction's taking you. _

"But Will, this isn't about you; it's about Jem," she said, and her voice broke on her husband's name. She had been married only a short time, and now she was about to become a widow at such a young age.

"I've known that this day was coming for such a long time, but now that it's here, I don't want it to be happening; I don't want it to be real," Will said in such a raw voice that Tessa's already broken heart started splintering even more.

"No one wants this to be real, but it is," Tessa said in her most soothing voice, taking a few tentative steps towards Will. "Please, Jem wants you by his side," she added, and Will hung his head. "He never gave up, and he fought for so long because he had you by his side, giving him strength. Don't let him down now."

"I think that you've given him more strength than I ever have," Will replied in a quiet voice, and Tessa sighed.

"We've both given him strength, and now he needs us," Tessa corrected, and Will gave the tiniest nod of his head, his eyes lowered to the ground. Tessa hesitantly reached for his hand, and when he gripped hers like a vice, she was glad that he wasn't looking at her – he didn't see her flinch in pain.

_Can you see me through bloodshot eyes (bloodshot eyes) _

_Should I fight for what is right or let it die? _

_Now I'm choking on force fed lies _

_Do I fight or let it die? _

"Come on, let's go home," she said, and Will allowed her to lead him back through the winding streets of London, and back into the Institute. Tessa was about to lead him up the stairs and to where Jem was waiting for their return, but Will hesitated in the foyer, his hand slipping from Tessa's.

"I'll be up in a minute," Will said, and Tessa shot a disbelieving look at him. "I will, I promise. I just- I'll be up in a minute," he said, and Tessa sighed before she left him behind. She'd done what she had said she would and brought Will back. Now she wanted to be with her dying husband.

"Fine, but if you don't come up, you will regret it," she said, and Will quirked an eyebrow at her.

"Was that a threat?" he asked, a hint of his usual playfulness back in his voice.

Tessa shook her head. "No, it's just the truth. It will be one of your deepest regrets if you don't get to say goodbye to Jem," she said, and then she left Will alone to ponder her words.

_I will fight, one more fight _

_Don't break down in front of me. _

_I will fight, name your price_

_I am not the enemy._

_I will try one last time _

_Are you listening to me? _

_I will fight, the last fight _

_I am not your enemy. _

On the way back up to Jem's room, Tessa walked passed a drawing room, in which she could hear the voices of Charlotte and Henry. Charlotte sounded like she was close to tears, and Tessa could just make out the quiet murmurings of Henry, no doubt trying to sooth his grieving wife.

"I don't care what his problem is anymore," Tessa heard Charlotte saying as she crept closer to the door. "This isn't about him, but as usual he has to storm off and make himself the centre of attention. It's just so typical of Will," she said, and Tessa could hear the annoyance in her voice.

"'I'm sure that he's hurting just as much as the rest of us are, if not more so," Henry said, and Tessa could hear Charlotte's shoes on the timber floors, no doubt pacing.

"Yes, but Will's reaction is hardly helping, and its just making us all focus on him, when we should be with Jem," she said, and Tessa heard her flop down onto a chair, the material of her skirts rustling with the movement.

"Hopefully Tessa has brought him back," Henry said, and the girl in question gave a small smile.

"Tessa's the only one Will ever really listens to," Charlotte grumbled. "I swear, I don't know how much more of his moods I can take. It's too much with Jem already; I can't deal with Will now too."

_Everyone is sick of caring _

_No silver lining on the cloud that covers you _

_Let it pour and soak you through _

Tessa retreated from the door, having heard enough of Charlotte's conversation with Henry. Besides, it wasn't proper to spy. On the way back up to Jem's room, she passed Sophie and Gideon standing together in the hall, quietly talking. Sophie held a handkerchief to her eyes, and Gideon soothingly rubbed her arm, looking down at her with sad eyes. When they saw her approaching, Sophie quickly tried to compose herself, but she needn't have bothered. Tessa knew just how much Sophie cared for Jem, and she was glad that Gideon Lightwood was by her side.

_No hope, just desperation _

_So sit and wait for death _

_And pray it takes you soon. _

_The addiction's taking you. _

Tessa pushed open Jem's door and made her way back to the chair that was by his bedside. His eyes were closed, and he wasn't moving. For one panicked second, Tessa thought that he had died whilst she'd been out chasing after Will. But then his head turned towards her, and his eyes opened. Tessa breathed a sigh of relief. He hadn't left her just yet.

_Can you see me through bloodshot eyes (bloodshot eyes) _

_Should I fight for what is right or let it die? _

_Now I'm choking on force fed lies _

_Do I fight or let it die? _

"Did you find Will?" he asked, and his voice sounded tired and pained. Another piece of her heart splintered off at the sound of it.

"I did," she assured him. "He's downstairs, but he will be up soon," she added, and Jem nodded.

"Good," he said, and then closed his eyes again. His breathing sounded laboured, and Tessa wove her fingers through his, trying to channel her strength into him. Anything just to help him to hold on for a little while longer.

_I will fight, one more fight _

_Don't break down in front of me. _

_I will fight, name your price_

_I am not the enemy. _

_I will try one last time _

_Are you listening to me? _

_I will fight, the last fight _

_I am not your enemy. _

She had been sitting in silence for so long, just listening to the ragged sounds of Jem's breathing, that when the door opened it sounded impossibly loud. Tessa's head spun around, her grey eyes locking with piercing blue, and she breathed a sigh of relief as Will stepped into the room. He stood for a long moment looking awkward, not venturing too far in and, Tessa noticed, not looking in Jem's direction. He looked like an animal that wanted to bolt, but he didn't, and for that she was grateful.

"William," Jem's tired voice said, and it was like whatever spell had been holding Will in place had been broken, freeing him to move once again. He strode forward, positioning himself on the opposite side of the bed to Tessa, and when Jem saw him, he smiled. "You're here."

"Of course," Will replied, picking up his friend's hand. It felt so small and frail, even by Jem's standards, and Will felt a sense of horror wash through him. It was all too real; Jem was dying. Jem, the boy who was his closest companion, and his greatest sin. Jem, who had become more like blood family to him than what his own true family had ever been. Jem, who had bested him when it had come to winning Tessa's heart. Will was losing him one ragged breath at a time, and he could feel his own breaths sticking in his lungs as they felt like they were being squeezed. It couldn't be happening; Jem didn't deserve this.

_Can you feel me through bloodshot eyes (through bloodshot eyes) _

_Should I fight another night or let it die? _

_Now I'm choking on every lie. _

_Do I fight or let it die? _

"Will, I want you to do something for me," Jem said, his silvery eyes wide and glassy, like they couldn't properly focus anymore. "I'm entrusting Tessa's safety to you. Look after her for me," he said, and all Will could do was to nod dumbly in response. "My dear Tessa," Jem said, turning to face his young wife. "_Ni hen piao liang_," he finished with a smile. It was the first Mandarin he had ever spoken to her, and she knew every sound by heart. Her eyes welled with tears as she realised that he was saying goodbye forever to her, and she choked on a sob.

"_Ave atque vale_." The soft words came from Will, and Tessa gave a little gasp as she recognised the Shadowhunter farewell. Jem closed his eyes and seemed to sink back into his pillow, almost content after hearing the Latin words.

"Farewell, my brother," Jem said in such a quiet voice that Tessa almost didn't hear him. He lifted both of his hands that held theirs, and brought them together. Will's hand slipped over hers, and Tessa looked up into his eyes for a moment, before she looked back down at her husband. He was lying deathly still, and Tessa let out a little whimper as she realised that he was gone.

_I will fight, one more fight _

_Don't break down in front of me. _

_I will fight, name your price _

_I am not the enemy. _

_I will try one last time _

_Are you listening to me? _

_I will fight, the last fight _

_I am not your enemy. _

The song ended, and Tessa came back to the present, her cheeks wet with tears. On her ring finger still sat the Carstairs family ring; a testament to the young husband that she had loved and lost. Around her neck on a silver chain hung another Shadowhunter ring, this one bearing the crest of the Herondale family. The two rings were all that she had left now of the two young men that had been such an important part of her life. Will had kept his promise to Jem, and had stayed with Tessa, always keeping a watchful eye on her. Even when he had gone on to marry another woman, William Herondale had always made a place in his home for her, and he still owned a place in her heart.

"The unfortunate thing about the long lives that we live is that we always seem to be losing the people that we care about the most," the voice of Magnus Bane from a century earlier said, pushing its way through Tessa's memories. "But just remember that even though we may lose the people, the love that existed will never die, so long as you keep it alive, Tessa. Remember the people, remember that feeling, and you will have them with you forever."

She wondered fleetingly if Magnus ever thought about what he would do when he inevitably lost Alec, as he seemed more in love with the young Lightwood boy than he had with any of the other lovers that Tessa had ever seen him with. It wasn't a thought that she liked to dwell on, but she knew that that day was coming for Magnus. It came for all of those who were cursed with such a long life, and who in turn fell in love with mortals.

Tessa had only ever let two mortal boys into her heart, and as the CD player started up another song, she closed her eyes and let the horrible memories fade, allowing happier ones to shine through. She remembered Jem playing his violin; Will quoting poetry with his smarmy little smirk; Jem's gentle hands on hers; Will's desperate, crushing embraces. She remembered coach rides through London streets; train rides into the country, and leisurely strolls along the Thames. She remembered laughter, and she remember anger, but most of all, Tessa remembered being loved, and that would always be enough to see her through the long passage of time.

**The End**


End file.
